Golf Jokes

Golf Jokes Second Edition (Page Ten)

Golf Jokes
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This golfer was getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a second golfer approached him, and asked if he could join him. ?? The first one said that he usually played alone, but agreed to play a two ball with him.

They were all square after the three holes. So The second guy said, We're about evenly matched I think, and then asked, how about playing for five pounds a hole for the last 15 holes ?

The first man said that he wasn't much of a betting man, but agreed to play for money.
The second guy won the remaining 15 holes with ease. and was paid his winnings
As they were walking off the last hole,  he was counting the money he had won, but then confessed that he was a pro at a neighboring golf course and liked to pick on easy meat to win money from them.

The first man revealed then that he was not that good a golfer, and never ever had made a wager in his life before, as he was the local Parish Priest.
The pro then got all flustered and apologetic, offering to return the money to the priest.

The Priest said, You won it fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. so You keep your winnings.
The pro said,  but Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
The Priest said, Well, !!!  yes my good man, you could come to Mass this Sunday and make a donation to the church, ??? 

 

And, if you would like to bring your mother and father along, I'll would be pleased to marry them...." ???????

 

 
 

The Top 10 Best  Replies from a Caddy


 no 10   Golfer, I Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake." Caddy,  do you Think you can keep your head down that long?"

 no  9   Golfer, I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy, Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth.

 no  8   Golfer, Do you think my game is improving?" Caddy, Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

 no  7   Golfer, Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?" Caddy, Eventually."

 no  6   Golfer, You've got to be the worst caddy in the world." Caddy, I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence."

 no  5   Golfer, Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of A distraction." Caddy, It's not a watch - it's a compass."

 no  4   Golfer, How do you like my game?" Caddy, Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf."

 no  3   Golfer, Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?" Caddy, The way you play, sir, it's a sin to play on any day."

 no  2   Golfer, This is the worst course I've ever played on." Caddy, This isn't the golf course. We left that over an hour ago."

 no  1    Golfer, That can't be my ball, it's too old." Caddy, It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."

 

 
 
 
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